Relationships - Complex and yet simple

We are social animals, which means we like to associate with people. From the birth till our death we are influenced by and, most of the times unintentionally, influence others. This contact between 2 people, however brief it may be, where they acknowledge the existence of each other creates a relationship between them.

The moment you are born you have your first relationship, with your mother, considered to be the most sacred of all relationships in one's lifetime. You are dependent on her for your survival while she is bound to you by the love of offspring. With this you start to grow up gradually and create many more relationships with other people around you.

We can categorize all the relationships formed during one's lifetime into 4:

 

• Family Relationships
• Friendships
• Romantic Relationships, and
• Acquaintanceships

 

Each relationship has its own dynamic however what all of them have in common is a need of interaction between 2 people. To carry any type of relationship one has to understand the other parties needs out of that relationship. And this is also the most difficult thing to understand. Some of us have an innate ability or we learn over time to identify these needs however some of us struggle with that almost all of our life.

 

According to Psychology Today, the basis of a good relationship is willingness to devote time and attention to each other. I modify this statement to:

"The basis of a good relationship is willingness to devote time and attention to each other in accordance with the type of relationship."

I have made this statement because each relationship requires a different level of communication and degree of intimacy. You may not share with your parents everything that you share with your friends. For sure you would not share you deepest secrets to an acquaintance however you may not want to hide anything from your partner. We will discuss each category in later posts.

 

Thus each and every relationship is different and this makes managing different relationships very complex. However if we do not forget that each relationship requires us to invest time and attention, all we have to figure out is how much to invest in which relationship. The simplest part of a relationship is that you need to communicate and let the other individual know what kind of relationship you intend to have with them. If they reciprocate then you need to be consistent with the investment. It takes some time and lot of effort to come to a balance with relationships but it is doable.